One Heck of a Day

Yesterday was a doozy of a day. Luckily at 7 in the morning on Saturday there is not much traffic. As I was headed home from work and on the overpass of the freeway, a truck pulling a horse trailer became unhitched. We were both descending the overpass in the left, fast lane. The driver must have felt something happening because he quickly got into the right lane looking for a shoulder. Unfortunately, there was not much of one due to being on a narrow overpass. He was far enough ahead of me that I was catty corner by the time the trailer broke loose. The trailer started to careen over into my lane headed straight for me. Then the left wheel caught and spun it around causing it to violently crash into the right guard rail just as I passed it. It all happened so fast yet seemed to be going in slow motion. The driver had slowed enough to pull to the side about 200 yards from the wrecked trailer. The first vision I had flash before my eyes was of my babies and Max. The second was that I feared there were horses in the trailer as I saw something brown crash against the small window in the rear. I imagined maimed and hurting horses. I pulled to the side of the road to help if I could. Due to the lack of the shoulder, I was half in the right lane. The passenger jumped out of the truck and came running toward her load, which was just stuff and thankfully not horses. She thanked me for stopping but urged me on for fear of me being hit by traffic that could not see us as they came over the top of the pass. I made sure they had a cell phone and I cautiously pulled back into traffic. (Photo from http://www.booksfast.net/denalimountains.jpg)

There were so many what ifs. What if I was in the right lane instead? What if I was going a little faster? What if the wheel hadn’t caught and turned the trailer? What if I was sleepy like usual and not as alert? What if there was someone behind me? As these thoughts flooded my mind, the adrenaline left and I felt weak and shaken. I began to cry. Not that beautiful soap opera style cry with sweet little tears rolling down. No, this was the deep sobbing kind that you can’t talk through, get all red and have snot streaming down your face kind. The picture of beauty. I called Max in this state and scared him half to death. After repeatedly trying to talk enough to tell him I am ok, I was able to tell him some of the details of the near miss. I arrived home and hugged all of them tightly. Today, I am down on my knees thankful that God has given me one more day to be a mommy to my precious girls and a wife to the most wonderful man I have ever known.


Well, if that wasn’t enough for one day…. I had an emotional ending to my day too. Hailey had her first sleep over at a friend’s house. Let me preface this by letting you know that Max and I are very protective parents and probably shelter our kids more than we should. But they have their whole life to be disillusioned and calloused by the reality of the world. Anyway, these are family friends and we have spent weekends together on vacation. So we knew she was in good hands. As we drove away (we had all been over for a birthday party) and watcher her excitedly wave I had to once again fight off the tears I felt welling up. The drive home felt empty with only two little ones babbling in the background. After getting the other two tucked in and getting in bed ourselves, the phone rang. I thought, ‘oh she is not ready and she is going to need me to come pick her up’. The mom tells me she is a little teary and wanted to talk to me before going to bed. I hear my little girl trying to be brave and not cry and whispering that she misses me and wants to come home. I encouraged her to stay and hug her bear and her friend and to remember that they are getting doughnuts in the morning. She brightened and decided she would stay. I tell the mom to not hesitate to call me. About 30 minutes later the phone rings and I get up ready to go get my baby. Wrong. The mom was just calling to let me know that after story time and her singing to them Hailey fell fast asleep, so I don’t have to worry. It was a bittersweet moment. You want them to spread their wings and fly, but it's so hard to let them out of the nest. I am proud of her for having her first sleep over and I am at the same time sad that we have crossed into new territory. I officially have a big kid; there is no keeping her small and sheltered. It’s a big, big world.

2 comments:

Gigi said...

Alas Katie, it never ends. At age 60 I sent Max's Uncle Phil a photo of himself at five in his favorite cowboy outfit w/the poem, "Turn back turn back, O time in thy flight, Give me my little one just f/tonight." He was moved to tears and so was I.
...................................
Rejoice that the near miss was just that. Lv Gigi

MKHKK said...

Gigi,
I think I am a bit of a sap but it is just how I feel. I never knew how hard it is to let your kids grow up. I know many parents can't wait for their kids to gain more and more independence, but I treasure this time of them being small.